If you have ever been to a dog park…
Let me start by saying I love the dog park. Thank you San Diego for providing such a beautiful place to take my partner in crime, Taco Danger Tuesday. He enjoys the ability to roam as he pleases and smell as many butts his nose desires. He is allowed to stand on the park tables and feel as if he owns all of said dog park. And I will even go as far as to say that if he could write in a diary at the end of the night, it would go like this:
“My human took me back to what I have come to understand as a “speed dating” event for dogs. I met 20 ladies within 30 minutes. However, they discourage the ritual of humping a friend to show that I am the best dog at the park. I find this confusing. Also, my owner keeps introducing me by the name Taco. I was not given this name. But she still calls me it. Again, very confusing.”
I hope you read that in a studious english accent because that is how I would imagine he’d speak if he were able to talk.
With all of that being said, I find the interactions with the dogs owners to be…well…hilarious. Often, I will slowly walk by the huddled group of people just to catch their conversations.
They mostly consist of conversations surrounding their pets. And really nothing else. It’s almost like a nervous twitch they all have acquired to ask what each other’s dog’s name is. I’ll give you an example.
So picture me walking by the huddled human heard.
Girl-in-too-fancy-to-be-at-a-park-outfit: “Oh my God. My dog is the exact same way. I’ll come home and he will have torn my entire house apart, and I’m just like…BUBBLES! NOT AGAIN! (Insert laughter from entire group.) But he is just the best dog ever.”
Guy-in-sunglasses-even-though-it-is-overcast: “I totally understand, Sir Lancelot over here rolled in a pile of trash and jumped in my bed with me!” (More laughter)
Fancy Pants sees me, well sees my dog, and immediately in a shrill voice asks what my dog’s name is/what breed he is.
Me: “His name is Taco. And his breed is Taco.”
I don’t actually know the breed of my animal. But I always wonder why people ask. I associate it with when people ask what another person’s race is. I am human. Anything else?
Anyway, these conversations circulate over and over again throughout the dog park. I know they are just trying to find something in common, but come on, you could ask perhaps what MY name is. I think I have only been asked once anything about me personally.
Maybe this is just protocol at dog parks and I didn’t receive the memo. I am new to the dog park world. Perhaps there should be a handout when you walk into the park with a list of human interaction rules.
- Pick up your dog’s poop
2. Angrily glare at the owner of the dog that is being rowdy
3. Only give detailed information about your dog’s eating habits, sleeping patterns, house issues, and abilities to catch flying objects
4 .DO NOT under any circumstance, get to know dog’s owner
5. Understand if you carry any treats, you bring treats for all. No exception
I guess what I am getting at is, it is a dog’s world out there, and were just living in it.
I think next time I am at the park I will shake everyone up and ask someone what they do for a living. I might even be able to start a revolution in the dog park world…or better yet, a DOGOLUTION. 😉
Well, that is about all I have to say on that subject. I hope you all have a fantastic night. And next time you’re at a dog park, completely ignore the dog and only talk to the human…Just kidding, Say hello to both!
Xoxo Haley Montgomery